


let me go

by dmdys



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: 2x06 sucked, F/M, M/M, Mentions of Sexual Assault, Other, are the roswell writers on crack?, fuck maria deluca, i legit hate anyone who thinks 2x06 was okay, if it isn't obviously i really hate maria in this incarnation of the series, maria deluca is my (fictional) mortal enemy, mentions of part self harm, michael and maria make me sick, please just get rid of maria, what the fuck are the roswell writers thinking?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:55:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23888569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dmdys/pseuds/dmdys
Summary: Michael stares at him, confused. "What the hell are you doing?"Alex leans down and picks up the now empty recycling box.."It was either this or blowing up the Pony, so I went for the option least likely to get me arrested."
Relationships: Maria DeLuca/Michael Guerin, Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 50
Kudos: 149





	let me go

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna be honest, other than _that scene_ , I haven't watched 2x06. I don't think I want to, to be honest. That scene alone made my PTSD flare up something awful, so this fic is part of my own way of dealing with it. I really hate what happened, and I have A LOT of hate for Maria right now, so here's some warnings:
> 
> Warnings for: mentions of sexual assault, mentions of past self-harm, lots of swearing, and lots of blaming Maria.
> 
> Edit: I'm gonna be honest, I am not kind to Maria. At all. If you like Miluca, I would advice against reading this.

Alex is smashing empty bottles against the wall of the cabin. He knows it's not productive, and he knows he'll curse himself afterwards when it's recycling day, but right now he _needs_ to do something to get his anger out. The sound of the crashing glass as it hits the solid wood isn't as cathartic as he'd hoped it would be, but it's better than returning to his teenage ways of coping.

He's on his last bottle when he hears the unmistakable sound of Michael Guerin's truck pull up. He pauses for a second, because he really, really doesn't feel ready to do this, not now, not yet. He can hear the truck door open and close, and he can picture how Michael looks as he makes his way around the cabin. It fills his chest with rage, red hot and searing, and he barely misses Michael's head when he launches the last bottle at the wall.

"Woah!" Michael screeches, ducking to avoid the shattered glass. "What the fuck, dude?!" He looks at the wall, then down to the shattered glass, twinkling like brown crystals in the sun.

Alex just makes a face of disgust and shakes his head. "You shouldn't be here, Guerin."

Michael stares at him, confused. "What the hell are you doing?"

Alex leans down and picks up the now empty recycling box.."It was either this or blowing up the Pony, so I went for the option least likely to get me arrested."

Michael furrows his brow, obviously oblivious. "You wanna tell me what's eating you?" 

Alex lets out a pained laugh. He'd went for sarcastic, but he apparently can't hold his emotions in check today. 

"I'm not doing this," Alex says, and he starts to make his way back to the cabin, but Michael grabs his arm and it takes all his willpower not to twist the curly-haired alien boy into an arm lock. 

"Doing what? Dude, what is going on?!" He let's Alex's arm go and steps back. "Is this about last night? Because you were fine this morn-"

"Of course this is about last night! Fuck!" He throws the box into a nearby bush, and he can't help but enjoy the look of shock on Michael's face. "And I wasn't _fine_ this morning, I just wanted to get out of there as soon as I could!"

Michael rocks back on a heel. "Alex," he says, voice a little softer. "I don't-"

"No." Alex cuts him off. "You don't know what to say because last night was the most fucked up thing that has ever happened between us," he laughs, sadly, and runs a hand through his hair. "And we've had _a lot_ of fucking up shit happen."

Michael doesn't say anything. Maybe he doesn't know what to say. Maybe he can't understand. 

"Last night..." Alex says. "Last night...that was wrong. It as so, so fucking wrong."

Michael runs a had through his own hair. "Alex, lots of people have thr-"

"That was _not_ a threesome," Alex interjects. "That wasn't even...consensual!"

Michael's face pales, but Alex didn't stop.

"I didn't want to be there. I told you both, several times, that I wanted to _leave_. Why the fuck would I want to be a part of... _that_." He lets out a breath and leans against the wall of the cabin. "I tried to leave, and _she_ wouldn't let me."

"Woah," Michael says, holding up his hands. "Maria didn't force you to do anything!"

Alex raises his eyebrows. "You're kidding me, right? I tried to leave and she literally held me next to her, and _kissed me_! I'm fucking gay, Guerin! You might not might like pussy, but I fucking hate it." 

Micheal flinches. He's not used to hearing Alex swear so much, or even be so angry. He puts his hands on his hips and hands his head a little. "It's not like...like it was...it wasn't like we ra-"

"I didn't say it was." Alex cuts him off, even though a part of him, an aching, gnawing part of him wants to say it was. "But I tried to leave. I didn't want to be there, and I said I was leaving." He lets out a weak laugh. "But she knew I'd stay. For you. She knew." He shakes his head. "She fucking knew." At that, Alex slides down the wall to sit on the gravel.

"She knew what?" Michael's voice is low.

"She knew...that I would do anything for you." He looks up at Michael, trying to hold back his tears. "Maria knew that I would do _anything_ to have you want me. She played me." He looks at his boots. "She wanted me to believe that there was a way I could still have you, but I can't, because she won." He shrugs and wipes his eyes.

"What do you mean, she won? It's not...it's not a competition, Alex, it was a weird situation and-"

"That _she_ manipulated!" Alex raises his voice. "I begged to leave, and she knew that if you kissed me I'd never leave. Just like I told her." 

"What? You told her what?"

"I told her, once, when I was still in high school, that if you never stopped kissing me, I'd never leave." He takes a breath. "She...she used me. To make sure you'd pick her."

Michael doesn't say anything, but he also can't look at Alex.

"She knew that this would make or break it for me. She knew it...." He trails off.

"Alex, I'm-"

"Don't say you're sorry, Guerin. I don't want it."

"I don't know what else to say!" Michael wails. "I though last night was just a bit-"

"-a bit of fun?" Alex pulls himself to his feet. "Oh, it was. For you. You got to fuck your girlfriend and your ex-boyfriend. You got the full pie. Me? I had to fuck a girl who I thought was my friend, and watch the fucking love of my life do her, too!"

Michael's silence is almost as destroying to Alex's soul as his defence of Maria.

"Maria isn't my friend." Alex says. "And neither are you." 

Alex walks around the cabin, and lets himself inside. He waits a few minutes, until he can hear the sound of Michael's truck leaving, before he allows the full force of his emotions consume him.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I'm sorry for the angst, the language, and any upset that anyone may feel from this fic. This was my way of dealing what Alex went through, and I will legit fight anyone who doesn't think it was assault. I am hating Michael/Maria so much to the point it's ruining the show for me. If I knew that Michael/Alex was endgame, I'd probably be okay, but I legit cannot stand Maria and Michael even being in the same scene together. There's absolutely no chemistry, and the fact she broke all the rules of friendship (you never hook up with your friend's ex, even if they say it's okay - it's not cool, okay?!) makes me so mad. As much as I like her relationship with her mother, that's tainted by my hate for her.
> 
> Sorry, that turned into a Maria Hatefest.


End file.
